My July article, "Praying for Deflation" was based on a news report that a church group had gathered near gas stations to pray for cheaper gas. They had prayed in May 2008; for a few weeks they had no success and I had ridiculed their efforts. However their prayers were ultimately answered, the price of gasoline started to fall and it has fallen by half from its peak. So they were right and I, the unbeliever, was wrong. In all humility, I apologize to this group.

Talking about humility, I do aver that I am an exceptionally humble person. In fact, come to think of it, there have been very few people who are as humble as me. If there was a Nobel Prize for humility, I would win hands down. Yes sir, when it comes to humility, I'm the greatest. However, I am sure you do not want to hear me boast about my humility, so let me return to the subject of invoking deflation. The prayer and its response need to be understood scientifically. There are a few notable points here.

For one thing, there was a delay of about 50 days between the prayers and the response. Now we can be reasonably sure that the Supreme One does not go on vacation (though it sometimes feels like it). Also we can safely assume that He does not procrastinate and allow His in-basket to pile up with stuff. So we can safely ascribe the 50 days delay to transmission time. Let's see, sound travels at seven hundred sixty five miles per hour, or 18,400 miles per day. In 50 days, sound would travel about 920,000 miles so we learn that God is almost a million miles from earth. Occasionally we hear reports about UFOs being sighted. Obviously, these are not aliens, but the Supreme himself, zooming in for a closer look. At His age, thousands, if not millions of years, it is understandable if his distance vision has deteriorated somewhat.

The second point is that there has been a miscommunication. While the intent was to pray for deflation in gas prices only, some of the faithful might have gone a little overboard and asked for everything to become cheaper. I am sure they meant to include food and necessities only but they might not have communicated it clearly. This has caused a terrible misunderstanding with the result that not only gasoline but ALL assets, ranging from housing to stocks and bonds to precious metals have suffered deflation. This has resulted in bank failures, millions of job losses and a looming depression. It is time for this congregation to regroup, this time at Wall Street and not at a Gas Station, and pray again. However, this time they need to be very specific and ask for deflation in gas prices and essential commodities while praying for inflation or at least appreciation, in assets. I am sure that thousands of Wall Street workers could join them. Their employers could give them a few minutes of time off from their daily schedule to attend these meetings. This would be a good investment and it might ensure their bonuses next year.

This raises another question. Some of the employees may be atheists and refuse to join in the prayers. Would their refusal be protected under the First Amendment or would it be considered insubordination and therefore subject to disciplinary action? Further, if the financial picture improves and the companies become profitable, would these employees be eligible for the resulting bonuses?

In any case, it has become clear that prayer is a very powerful activity. Like any powerful activity, it must be done with great care; otherwise the results can be extremely detrimental. We would also be taking the risk of irritating the Supreme by alternately praying for deflation and then inflation because:

Man is but a mortal fool
When it's hot, he wants it cool
When it's cool, he wants it hot
Always wanting what is not.

However, the rapid deterioration in the economy mandates quick action, especially as we know there is a 50 day time lag for getting results. So, even at the risk of irritating Him, let us save the economy by uniting and praying for inflation this time. We have placed our faith in the son of Paul (Treasury Secretary Paulson), and have yet to see any tangible results; let us now appeal to the son of Joseph.



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